So here you are, Bolts fan, wishing you and a companion could go to Gillette Stadium in Foxborough, Mass., and see the Chargers take on the New England Patriots at 1:15 p.m. on Sunday, Sept. 18. (I say companion because, if you’re reading this with your buddy and your significant other, both can fantasize that you would take them instead of me to the game. What do you mean you wouldn’t take me? It was my idea!) But then, you could also save yourself the trouble and take us all to RT’s Longboard Grill at 1466 Garnet Ave. to trash talk with Patriots fans and enjoy the many drink specials inside or out on the outdoor veranda. RT’s Longboard is a self-proclaimed “Patriots home” bar, “as well as a place where Charger fans have found a home to root for the Chargers,” according to general manager Johnny Leal. “It is a great place to watch Chargers football and a great place for those New England fans who now live in San Diego to cheer on the Patriots,” he said. RT’s has plenty of open space to get loud, a nice, beachy atmosphere inside and plenty of TVs so as not to miss any of the action when you feel the need to talk a little smack to the table of Pats fans next to you. Of course, if you really want to do it the hard way and fly to Foxborough, I’ve already created an itinerary for you! Here you go: You could fly out of San Diego on Saturday at 3:15 p.m. on American Airlines and land in Chicago at 9:05 p.m. on Saturday night. After a short layover, you depart Chicago at 10:20 p.m. and arrive in Boston at 1:25 a.m. Sunday. Easy peasy, right?! Get your rental car, drive to your hotel, the beautiful Westin Boston Waterfront for only $537 a night.Wicked! Unfortunately, when you arrive there at 3 a.m., you will need to sit in the lobby for a few hours because the beautiful Westin does not begin checking in guests until 11 a.m. After getting settled and napping (poorly due to excitement and the time change) you will then drive like a maniac for 25.8 miles to Foxborough and then pay an arm and a leg for parking. After securing a coveted parking space (sandwiched between two oversize SUVs and boxed in by the chain-link fence that lines the lot), you discover that you flew all the way across the country to see your beloved Chargers while your travel agent (me) did not explain how you were going to get tickets to the actual game (stupid writer/travel agent)! You are now left with the options of sitting in the parking lot, listening to the game on the car radio, or breaking the law and trying to scalp some tickets. After a few vain attempts to visualize plays as you sit in the car with the radio on, you opt to risk your clean record … and due to your stellar negotiating skills, you score a pair of obstructed view tickets for about $300 apiece (section 301, which is upper level corner/end zone). Relieved to have escaped the long arm of Johnny Law and happy about not having to rely on your pitiful imagination of the game, you flip the tickets over… face value $75. The game ends and you get back to the hotel at about 11 p.m. (accounting for an hour of back lot traffic exiting the stadium…not accounting for a post-game celebratory cocktail). You’re tired. You fall into a deep slumber by the time the door to your room closes behind you… only what is that god-awful buzzing sound?! Oh right, your alarm clock … you have to wake up at 3:30 a.m. to get your U.S. Airways flight back to San Diego, which leaves Boston at 5:30 a.m. and lands in Philadelphia at 6:51 a.m. You haul your cookies across the entire terminal because your connecting flight to San Diego leaves at 7:35 a.m. No problem… you’re well rested … NOT! Still, you take comfort in the fact that you can get some sleep on the plane. Whoops! It’s a daytime flight and you have a five-year-old boy kicking your chair and his mother is repeatedly scolding him for it (at least she’s doing that much, right?). The child then begins to cry and so do you. You land in San Diego at 10:11 a.m. and contemplate not going into work today because your face is tearstained and you look like hell … and you smell like a wet dog … and you are pretty sure you couldn’t differentiate between a client and a homicidal maniac right now and would most likely treat anyone you come into contact with as a hostile witness … Then it hits you. You spent over $5,000 on this little excursion and you can’t even afford to “rent” the spare room at your parents place… So, see? Wouldn’t it just be so much easier to save yourself all that money and aggravation and just swing on down to the comfy, tropical setting at RT’s Longboard Grill in Pacific Beach where Patriots fans and Chargers fans can co-exist in relative harmony? “It’s the Gillette Stadium of San Diego” said customer Brian Bersett, a transplant from Boston. “It’s like being at home without all the expenses.” Friend Alex Duarte is on the opposite side of the fence. “Patriots, whatever!,” said Duarte. ” I go there to watch Chargers football!” The third member of their party is a little more neutral. “Chargers? Patriots? I don’t care, as long as I am with my friends on Sunday during the big game at RT’s — the best place to watch football in PB,” said Jack Vecchio. Well, there you have it. Be sure to check out the Chargers/Patriots matchup at 1:15 p.m. on Sept. 18 at RT’s Longboard and experience the “Gillette Stadium West” for yourself. — Walter Ruskin is a member of the San Diego Community Newspaper Group’s “Ugly News Team.” Watch for his new video links online at www.sdnews.com.
